Healing may not be so much about getting better, as about letting go of everything that isn’t you — all of the expectations, all of the beliefs — and becoming who you are.
~ Rachel Naomi Remen
“What are you going to be like when you grow old like me?” my grandmother asked me one day when I said I was too tired to go outside and play.
“Why, I’ll be turning cartwheels, Grandma! I’m not going to get old,” I replied with the surety of youth.
I was a warrior last week. I walked, I jogged, I hiked, I rode my bike. I spent time on my yoga mat, stretching, twisting, bending, and resting. I did everything the health experts say you’re supposed to do.
But on Sunday morning, after Saturday’s 5K and before hiking almost 4 miles, I noticed I was sore. Monday morning, I was hobbling. Still, I carried on. I hiked. I took walks. I went for a jog. Wednesday afternoon I hopped on my bike. I pushed myself during my yoga practice. I did all these things thinking it would work out the kinks, loosen me up, and eventually eliminate the pain.
The muscles in my core, back, and legs were sore. My shins felt bruised. My hips and knees ached, especially my knees. I couldn’t see any swelling, but they felt as if they had blown up on the inside, and I noticed clicking when I rode my bike. I didn’t get it. It’s not as if I’ve been sitting on the couch for a year and then did a 5K with no training. What’s up, body? Why all this sudden pain and soreness?
There are so many ways to heal. Arrogance may have a place in technology, but not in healing. I need to get out of my own way if I am to heal.
~ Anne Wilson Schaef
Yesterday I stopped turning cartwheels. Yesterday I stopped. I sat. I listened and explored the pain. I iced. I allowed healing to begin. Today I have allowed healing to continue. Instead of pushing, I need to heed what my body is telling me. Rest, rest, rest.
Healing, Papa would tell me, is not a science, but the intuitive art of wooing nature.
~ W. H. Auden
Maybe next week I’ll be turning cartwheels, or maybe I’ll be finding new ways to do old tricks.
Aging is not lost youth but a new stage of opportunity and strength.
~ Betty Friedan
This weekend will be a resting weekend. If all goes as planned, M and I will be going to Rehoboth for the Rehoboth Beach Independent Film Festival, where I will immerse myself in the actions, art, and stories of others while continuing to rest.
How about you? Any plans for the weekend? And while I’m asking questions, do you ever push yourself a little too far? Or do you think there’s no such thing as pushing too far?
Be good, be kind, be loving. Just Be. 🙂 And have a great weekend!
Today’s joys: Puffy clouds racing across the sky. Brilliant sunlight. Gusty winds singing through the trees. A warm and spicy sweet potato and carrot soup. Watching the cats curl up together to take a nap.